The One With The Blind Dates [Season 9 Episode 14]
Scene:
Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is in the kitchen as Joey enters from his bedroom.
Joey: Morning, roomy!
Rachel: Hey! You remembered to put clothes on this morning.
Joey: Fifth day's a champ3.
Rachel: Oh, Joey, it's so great to be back here. I gotta tell you, you're making it so easy on me and Emma.
Joey: Hey, it's great having you back. You know, stay as long as you want, and when does she stop crying all night?
(Ross enters.)
Ross: Hey, you're not naked! So hey, Raych, when will we expect to see you tonight?
Rachel: Well, I'll probably be back to pick her up around six, but she's in the bedroom all ready to go. But she did actually fall back to sleep, so...
Joey: She's probably exhausted from all that adorable screaming she did last night.
Rachel: Bye!
(She leaves.)
Ross: Bye! Hey, I hope Emma isn't making it too hard on you.
Joey: No, hey, it's been great.
Ross: Yeah?
Joey: Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay? And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using a breast pump...
Ross: Yeah, that'll do it.
Joey: Wow! So, how are you?
Ross: I'm, I'm okay.
Joey: Really?
Ross: Sure, I mean, do I wish me and Rachel living together would have worked out? Of course. You know, I'm disappointed, but it's not like it's a divorce.
Joey: Well, actually it...
Ross: No, it's not a divorce, it is not a divorce! Anyway, I think Rachel and I need to, you know, get on with our lives, maybe, maybe start seeing other people.
Joey: Wow, really?
Ross: Yeah, sure, why not? In fact, if you know anyone that would be good for me...
Joey: Sure, I know lots of girls.
Ross: Yeah? Any names come to mind?
Joey: Ooh, names?
Opening credits
Scene:
Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters.
Phoebe: Hey.
Joey: Hey. I was just gonna get something to eat. You want something?
Phoebe: What you got?
Joey: (checks the refrigerator) Okay, let's see, we got strained peas, strained carrots... Ooh! Strained plums. We haven't tried that yet.
Phoebe: Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart from the great food.
Joey: I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just, it's just weird what's happening with her and Ross. You know, yesterday he asked me to fix him up with somebody.
Phoebe: Oh my god, Rachel asked me if I knew anyone for her too.
Joey: Why are they doing this?
Phoebe: I don't know. They're so perfect for each other; it's crazy.
Joey: You know what's crazy? These jars. What is it, like two bites in here?
Phoebe: I just wish they'd realize they should be together.
Joey: I know, I know. And when they moved back in together, I figured y'know, that's where things were headed.
Phoebe: I know. They should be a family. They should get married and have more children.
Joey: Yes, and they should name one of their kids Joey. I may not have kids; someone's gotta carry on the family name.
Phoebe: You know what? Maybe once they start dating, and they see what's out there, they'll realize how good they are for each other.
Joey: Yeah, because it is slim pickings. I had this date last night: Yuck! But we should probably keep it down; she's still in the bedroom.
Phoebe: So, what are we gonna do? Are we just gonna go ahead and set them up with people?
Joey: I know; that just pushes them further and further apart.
Phoebe: Yeah. ... Oh, I know what we can do. We could set Ross and Rachel up on horrible dates, so that they'll realize how good they are together.