JOHN: Here I am then, ready for all those gorgeous housewives, sitting around at home with nothing to do! Geez, these things are heavy! I sure hope I manage to sell a few of them soon.

JOHN: Here we are, Chernobyl Avenue. Let's start with No 1. Oh, it's an apartment building. Never mind, I'll start on the top floor and work my way down to the bottom. Excuse me sir, where's the elevator?

TENANT: You’ve got to be joking, man! There's no elevator here, you're going to have to go up the stairs.

JOHN: Oh, I see, thanks.

JOHN: Top floor, at last! Gee, that nearly killed me! I guess I should have left the boxes at the bottom. Oh well - here we go!

SLUM MUM: Well?

JOHN: Oh!

SLUM MUM: Well, what is it? If it's the rent, I'll be paying it tomorrow.

JOHN: Hey no, it’s nothing to do with the rent. I'd just like to ask you a few questions. Where the heck...? Sorry, I seem to have lost my bit of paper.

SLUM MUM: What bit of paper? What questions? Bill!

HER BOYFRIEND: What's going on here? Who is this guy?

SLUM MUM: He says he wants to ask us a lot of questions.

BOYFRIEND: Who are you? Who sent you here?

JOHN: I was just wondering if you had a washing machine, that's all! It doesn't matter; I think I'll be going now.

BOYFRIEND: Hey, not so fast! Come here!

JOHN: Must go. Real nice to have met you! So long!

BOYFRIEND: You’d better not come back!

JOHN: Gosh! I'd better get out of this building as fast as I can!

JOHN: Here we are! I've got my list of questions, I’ve got my machines. I'm ready to go!

MADAM OLGA: Yes? What can I do for you?

JOHN: Gee, hello! Um, er... do you like coffee?

MADAM OLGA: What a strange question! I think you'd better come in.

JOHN: Oh, thank you!

MADAM OLGA: Well, take your coat off.

JOHN: Oh, thank you.

MADAM OLGA: You can hang it up here in the hall. Go into my consulting-room there, and make yourself comfortable. I'll be with you in a couple of minutes.

JOHN: Gosh, what a weird place!

MADAM OLGA: Good morning.

JOHN: Good morning, madam. Now -

MADAM OLGA: No, don’t say anything. Let me see…. You have had a lot of bad luck in your time.

JOHN: That’s true enough.

MADAM OLGA: But your luck is about to change.

JOHN: Gee, is it really?

MADAM OLGA: Please stop interrupting me.

JOHN: Sorry.

MADAM OLGA: You will meet some interesting new people today. I see … a young woman, blonde, very beautiful. But I don’t see you talking to her about love. I see you talking about … washing machines?

JOHN: That’s right. You see - Oh darn it, I've left them outside!

JOHN: How does this lock work? I can't unlock the door!

MADAM OLGA: But where are you going? We haven’t finished the consultation.

JOHN: My machines will get stolen! I must bring them in!

MADAM OLGA: You don’t need your machines any more, young man. Let them go!

JOHN: No I can’t, I’m supposed to be selling them!

MADAM OLGA: Very well, but you'll have to pay for the consultation first. That is my rule.

JOHN: How much?

MADAM OLGA: $150.

JOHN: Oh, alright! Here you are. Please will you unlock the door now?

MADAM OLGA: Have a nice day! You won’t.

JOHN: Great! I shouldn’t have given her all that money. What a load of garbage! “You will meet some interesting new people! A beautiful young blonde woman.” In my dreams! Oh well, I’d better get on with it. Let's try next door.

ANNIE: Coming!

JOHN: Gosh! It’s true!

ANNIE: What?

JOHN: Sorry. Good morning, madam. Are you the only person in this house?

ANNIE: No, I share it with three other people. Why? What’s it do with you?

JOHN: Next question. Is the house owned or rented, and if rented, is it furnished or unfurnished?

ANNIE: We rent it, unfurnished. Look, would you mind telling me who you are? I'm sure I've seen you somewhere before.

JOHN: Yes; my name’s John Berry.

ANNIE: John Berry?

JOHN: Yes.

ANNIE: Who used to live next door to my father? What the hell are you doing here?

JOHN: Gee, of course! You're Annie Peters! Gosh, I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you! You've changed a lot! Your hair's different; you're just as pretty as ever, though. Gosh, fancy that! Fancy us meeting each other again like this! Do you remember the good old days, when Hugo and I were neighbors, and... hey, I’m sorry Annie, I shouldn't have mentioned Hugo. I'm real sorry about what happened.

ANNIE: So am I. Now, would you hurry up and explain what you came here for?

JOHN: Er, yeah, sure, like, I'm here to demonstrate this amazing new machine, which makes clothes and washes coffee... No, I mean, it washes clothes and...

ANNIE: So you didn't know I lived here? You just came here by accident, not on purpose?

JOHN: Oh no. As I was saying, this machine...

ANNIE: OK, that's all. Please go now.

JOHN: Hey, Annie! Look, never mind about the machine! Are you doing anything tonight? What about tomorrow night?

ANNIE: Go away!

JOHN: Oh darn it! I shouldn’t have tried to sell her a machine; I should just have asked her out to dinner. What else did Madam Olga say? Some stuff about meeting interesting new people, wasn’t it?

BEDGES: Excuse me, sir. Could we have a little word with you?

JOHN: Eh?

BEDGES: Just get into the car please sir.

JOHN: What for? What about my boxes?

BEDGES: You won't be needing them. In you go, please.

JOHN: Hey, I can't just leave my boxes there! Where are you taking me?

HENSON: Tell him we're asking the questions.

BEDGES: We're asking the questions. What was the purpose of your visit to No. 26 Chernobyl Avenue, sir?

JOHN: To sell them something. That's why I need those boxes. Please, can we -

BEDGES: Do you know any of the inhabitants of the house?

JOHN: No! I mean... well, yes. I know Annie... well, like, sort of. I mean, I used to know her father, before he... he, you know...

BEDGES: So you've been a close friend of Miss Peters for quite a long time?

HENSON: Ask him if he belongs to any subversive political organizations.

BEDGES: Are you a member of any subversive political organizations, sir?

JOHN: Oh no, no, no! I'm not political at all, I vote Republican. Oh, say can you see, By the dawn’s early light -

HENSON: That's be all for now, Bedges.

BEDGES: You can get out now, sir.

JOHN: Thank you.

BEDGES: Take care, won’t you?

BEDGES: Haven’t we forgotten something?

HENSON: What?

BEDGES: I was very suspicious of those boxes, sir. We should have looked inside them.

HENSON: No, we shouldn't. Too dangerous. You never know with these terrorists. Anyway, we don't want him to get suspicious of us, do we?

BEDGES: No, sir.

HENSON: Right. What we'll do is this: we'll follow him, and see what he does next. And let's tell the Chief what we've found.

HENSON: Mr Carter? I have some very interesting news for you. We're following this guy who calls himself a door to- door salesman, and, believe it or not...